Neon Moose Antlers

A blue plastic paperclip snapped sharply under Yuri’s thumb.

"You cannot be serious right now."

"I am completely serious. Look at the edges of the letters, Yuri. I used real scissors. I used glue sticks. That means business."

"Mona. I have the City Council presentation at four o'clock."

"Which is exactly why you need the moose."

Mona stood in the center of his cubicle. The fabric walls were a muted, soul-crushing beige. Her jacket was a blinding, radioactive yellow that seemed to hum under the flickering fluorescent lights. She was a bright glitch in his gray world. She slapped her hands down on his desk. The cheap wood laminate vibrated.

"Where did you even get these magazines?" Yuri asked. He picked up the ransom note. The paper was stiff. Little bumps of dried glue sat under the mismatched letters. It read: WE HAVE THE MOOSE. FOLLOW THE CLUES OR HE BECOMES PLASTIC DUST.

"A dentist waiting room," Mona said. "Listen to me. They took him. The Thunder Bay Public Art Initiative is ruined if you do not have the centerpiece for your slideshow."

"Who is 'they'?" Yuri dragged his hands down his face. His skin felt hot. His glasses slipped down the bridge of his nose. He pushed them up with a harsh jab of his index finger. "Mona, this is a joke. You are playing a joke. I do not have time for a joke. The Mayor is going to be in that room."

"The Mayor loves art!" Mona shouted. She grabbed the back of his mesh office chair and spun it around so he was forced to look at her. "Yuri. Get up. We have to go. The first clue is on the back of the note."

Yuri flipped the stiff paper over. On the back, written in thick, squeaky black marker, were the words: WHERE THE BASS SHAKES THE GUM UNDER THE TABLES.

"Mona, no. I am calling building security. The moose is eight feet tall. It is made of solid fiberglass. Nobody just walks out of the lobby with a giant purple moose."

"He has neon pink antlers, Yuri! Get the details right!" Mona grabbed his wrist. Her fingers were cold. "We are going. Right now."

She pulled. Yuri resisted for exactly two seconds. Then, the sheer panic of actually facing the City Council without his prop hit him. The presentation was entirely built around that moose. It was his career milestone. If the moose was gone, he was just a guy standing in front of a projector talking about budgeting. He stood up. His knees cracked.

"Fine," Yuri said. "Fine. But if this is one of your performance art pieces, I am going to lose my mind."

"Stop talking. Start walking," Mona said.

They moved through the rows of cubicles. The carpet absorbed the sound of Yuri’s sensible brown dress shoes. Mona’s heavy black combat boots clomped loudly, a rhythmic destruction of the office quiet. Phones were ringing in the distance. Keyboards were clacking. Yuri felt every single pair of eyes on them. He hated being perceived. He hated being loud.

They hit the glass double doors of the lobby. Mona pushed them open with both hands.

The summer heat hit Yuri like a physical wall. The air conditioner of the office vanished, replaced immediately by the heavy, radiating warmth of the concrete sidewalk. The sun was a blinding white circle directly overhead. Yuri squinted. The light was so bright it made his eyeballs ache. Cars rushed past on the street, metal bodies flashing with painful reflections of sunlight.

"Where are we going?" Yuri demanded. He pulled at his collar. It was already sticking to his neck.

"The clue, Yuri. Read the clue again," Mona said. She was already walking backward down the sidewalk, balancing on the edge of the curb with annoying perfection.

"Where the bass shakes the gum under the tables. That makes no sense."

"Think about it! You are so literal. Stop being an office drone for five seconds and use your brain."

"I am not a drone. I am a project manager."

"Same thing!" Mona spun around and skipped over a massive crack in the pavement. "Where is the loudest place in town? Where did we go on our third date?"

Yuri stopped walking. His chest tightened. A very specific, very uncomfortable memory hit him. The flashing lights. The deafening music. The time he spilled a bright blue soda all over his own shirt because the floor was vibrating so hard.

"The neon arcade," Yuri said.

"Bingo!" Mona yelled. She pointed a finger gun at him. "Let's go. The kidnappers are waiting."

The Sticky Neon Floor

The heavy black door of the arcade was covered in peeling band stickers. Mona ripped it open. The sound slammed into Yuri instantly. It was a chaotic symphony of digital explosions, ringing bells, and a thumping bass track that rattled his teeth.

The room was dark, lit only by the violent flashes of arcade screens. Neon pink and electric blue light washed over the worn carpet. The pattern on the floor was a dizzying mix of geometric shapes that made Yuri feel slightly nauseous.

"Mona, this place is entirely inappropriate for a Tuesday afternoon!" Yuri shouted over the noise.

"Tuesday afternoons are a social construct!" Mona yelled back. She grabbed his tie and yanked him toward a row of pinball machines in the back. "Start looking!"

"Looking for what?"

"The next clue!"

Yuri knelt down. The floor was incredibly sticky. His knee adhered to the carpet for a second before pulling away with a sickening tearing sound. He groaned. "My suit pants are ruined. I paid forty dollars for dry cleaning."

"You are ghosting your own life!" Mona dropped to her hands and knees beside him. She shoved her head entirely under a machine flashing with bright orange alien graphics. "You care more about the crease in your pants than the adventure!"

"I care about my job! I am optimizing my future!"

"You are boring!" she shot back.

"I am not boring! I am reliable!"

"Reliable is just another word for predictable, Yuri!" Mona’s voice echoed weirdly from under the machine. "What happens when you wake up in ten years and realize you never actually did anything surprising? What happens when things change?"

"Things do not need to change if you plan them correctly!"

"Wrong!" Mona slid out from under the machine. Her hair was static-charged and sticking up in three different directions. She held up a small, crinkled piece of yellow paper. "Found it. Taped right next to a giant wad of pink bubblegum."

Yuri snatched the paper from her. His fingers brushed against hers. The friction was sudden and sharp. He pulled his hand back quickly, staring down at the messy handwriting.

"GO UNDERGROUND WHERE THE GHOSTS RIDE," Yuri read aloud. He looked up at the flashing ceiling lights. "We do not have a subway system in Thunder Bay."

"No, but we have the old transit tunnels," Mona said. Her eyes were bright, reflecting the neon signs. "The ones they boarded up in the nineties. By the old railyard."

"Mona, absolutely not. That is trespassing. That is dangerous. There is broken glass. There are rats."

"Are you a coward, Yuri?"

"I am a city employee!"

"The moose is waiting!" Mona grabbed his arm again. Her grip was tight. She dragged him back toward the heavy black door.

They spilled back out into the blinding summer street. The sudden shift from loud, dark neon to silent, glaring sunlight made Yuri stumble. He rubbed his eyes violently. His pulse was hammering in his throat. He looked at his watch. It was one o'clock. He had three hours to find a giant fiberglass animal.

"You are walking too slow!" Mona called out. She was already half a block ahead, her yellow jacket a beacon against the gray concrete buildings.

Yuri ran to catch up. His breath was coming in short, shallow gasps. "Why are you doing this? Why are you so invested in this stupid moose?"

Mona did not turn around. She just kept walking, her boots striking the pavement in a relentless rhythm. "Because someone has to show you that you are alive before it is too late."

"Before what is too late?" Yuri asked.

She ignored him. She turned the corner, heading toward the industrial edge of the city. Yuri felt a sharp pang in his stomach. It was the same feeling he got when he missed a step on a staircase. A sudden drop. A warning.

Rust on the Chain-Link

The old railyard was a graveyard of rusted metal and overgrown weeds. The sun beat down on the abandoned tracks, making the steel rails shimmer with heat distortion. Yuri stopped at the edge of the gravel. His shoes crunched loudly.

"Mona. Stop. Look at this place. We cannot go down there."

Mona was already standing at the entrance of a concrete stairwell that led straight down into pitch darkness. A tall chain-link fence blocked the stairs. A heavy padlock hung from the center, coated in thick brown rust.

"Yes, we can. We just have to go over," she said. She hooked her fingers through the metal diamonds of the fence.

"You want me to climb a fence? In dress pants?"

"Take them off, then. I do not care." Mona pulled herself up. The metal rattled violently. The sound echoed down into the black void of the tunnel.

Yuri watched her swing her leg over the top bar. She moved with chaotic grace. She dropped down on the other side. Her boots hit the concrete stairs with a heavy thud.

"Your turn, city boy," she called through the fence.

Yuri grabbed the wire. It was hot from the sun. The texture was rough, flaking with orange rust that immediately coated his palms. He swallowed hard. He hated heights. He hated dirt. He pulled himself up. His foot slipped on the wire, sending a jolt of panic through his chest. He gripped the top bar tightly, his knuckles turning white. He threw his leg over, feeling the fabric of his trousers pull dangerously tight.

He let go and dropped.

He hit the concrete hard. The shock traveled straight up his legs and into his spine. He stumbled forward, right into Mona. She caught his shoulders.

The moment their bodies collided, the atmosphere shifted. The oppressive heat of the sun was gone, replaced by a deep, unnatural cold radiating from the tunnel walls. The light above them felt miles away. It was incredibly dark.

Yuri’s hands instinctively grabbed Mona’s waist to steady himself. She did not pull away. For a long second, neither of them moved. The loud rattling of the fence faded into absolute silence. Yuri could hear his own breathing. He could hear her breathing. The fabric of her jacket crinkled under his fingers.

"You made it," she whispered. Her voice sounded different down here. Smaller.

"I made it," Yuri echoed. He realized he was staring directly into her eyes in the dim light. He suddenly remembered exactly why they had broken up. It was not because he did not care. It was because she made him feel like he was standing on the edge of a cliff, and he was terrified of falling.

He let go of her waist quickly and took a step back. His foot scraped loudly on the gravel-covered concrete.

"Where is the moose, Mona?" his voice cracked slightly.

She turned away. She pulled a small flashlight from her pocket and clicked it on. The beam cut through the darkness, illuminating graffiti-covered walls. Neon spray paint layered over decaying concrete.

"Keep walking," she said.

They moved deeper into the tunnel. The ground was uneven, littered with old soda cans and broken rocks. Yuri kept his eyes on the circle of light bouncing ahead of them.

"I might not always be around to drag you out of your cubicle, you know," Mona said suddenly. Her voice bounced off the walls, multiplying the words until they surrounded him.

"What does that mean?"

"Nothing. Just... things change. People move."

"You are not moving. You have that mural commission at the library."

"Murals get finished, Yuri. Paint dries. And then you have to find a new wall."

Yuri frowned in the dark. He reached out and grabbed the back of her jacket. He didn't want to fall behind. He didn't want to lose the light. "You are talking in riddles again. Stop doing that."

"Look!" Mona shouted, shining the flashlight upward.

At the end of the tunnel, a set of metal stairs led back up to the surface. Taped to the handrail was another bright yellow piece of paper.

Yuri rushed forward and ripped it off the rail.

WHERE THE CARS SLEEP IN THE SKY, he read.

"The parking garage," Yuri said immediately. "The big concrete one on 4th Street. It is the highest point in this neighborhood."

"Exactly," Mona smiled in the flashlight beam. "Let's go rescue your career."

Disco Moose

They pushed through the heavy metal fire doors and stumbled out onto the roof of the parking garage. The blinding summer sun assaulted them again. Yuri threw his arm up to shield his eyes.

The heat was intense, radiating off the vast expanse of gray concrete. The city skyline stretched out around them, tall glass buildings reflecting the bright blue sky.

And there it was.

Standing in the dead center of the empty rooftop was the Thunder Bay Public Art Initiative centerpiece. It was an eight-foot-tall fiberglass moose. It was painted a vibrant, glossy purple. Its massive antlers were a shocking neon pink.

But it was not just a moose anymore. Someone had draped a massive silver sequined jacket over its back. A pair of oversized, sparkly star-shaped sunglasses were glued to its giant face. A disco ball hung from one of the antlers, catching the sunlight and throwing hundreds of tiny white dots across the concrete deck.

Yuri stared at it. His mouth hung open. He looked at the sequins. He looked at the glue. He looked at the star glasses.

He slowly turned his head to look at Mona.

She was standing a few feet away, her hands jammed deep into the pockets of her yellow jacket. She was biting her bottom lip. Hard.

"There is no kidnapper," Yuri said. The realization hit him like a physical blow to the chest. The air suddenly felt too thin to breathe. "There was never a kidnapper. You did this."

Mona looked down at her boots. She kicked a small pebble across the concrete. It made a sharp, scratching sound.

"You stole city property. You dragged me across town. You made me climb a fence. For what?" Yuri’s voice was rising. He threw his arms out. "Mona, I have a presentation in two hours! I was terrified!"

"I know!" she yelled back. She looked up. Her eyes were bright, brimming with tears that refused to fall. "I know you were terrified! You are always terrified, Yuri! You live your entire life terrified of making a mistake!"

"So you sabotage my career to teach me a lesson?"

"No!" Mona took a step toward him. Her hands came out of her pockets. They were shaking. "I did it because I leave for Montreal on Tuesday!"

Yuri froze. The anger in his chest instantly evaporated, replaced by a cold, hollow vacuum. "What?"

"Tuesday. I bought the train ticket a month ago. I got a permanent studio space. I am leaving, Yuri. I am not coming back."

The wind whipped across the roof, rattling the sequins on the moose's jacket. The disco ball spun slowly, casting dizzying spots of light over Mona’s face.

"You are leaving," he repeated. The words felt heavy and awkward in his mouth.

"Yes. And I could not leave knowing you were just going to sit in that beige cubicle until you turned to dust. I needed to see you run. I needed to see you jump a fence. I needed you to remember how to be alive before I disappeared."

Mona swiped a hand across her eyes, wiping away a rogue tear. She let out a wet, sarcastic laugh. "So, congratulations. You found your prop. You saved your presentation. You can go back to being perfectly safe."

She turned around and started walking toward the stairwell doors.

Yuri watched her walk away. The bright yellow jacket. The heavy boots. The messy hair. He looked at the giant purple moose in its ridiculous sunglasses. He thought about the beige walls of his office. He thought about the perfectly aligned paperclips on his desk. He thought about living the next forty years of his life in absolute, quiet safety.

It sounded exactly like dying slowly.

"Mona!" Yuri shouted.

She stopped, her hand hovering over the door handle. She didn't turn around.

Yuri ran across the hot concrete. His dress shoes slipped slightly, but he didn't care. He grabbed her shoulder and spun her around. Before she could speak, before she could crack a sarcastic joke, he grabbed her face and kissed her.

It was clumsy. It was jarring. Their teeth clashed slightly. Yuri’s glasses bumped against her nose. But it was real. It was the most violently real thing he had felt in months. Mona gasped against his mouth, her hands flying up to grip the lapels of his suit jacket. She pulled him closer, kissing him back with a fierce, desperate energy.

The sun beat down on them, hot and relentless. The distant sound of city traffic drifted up from the streets below. Yuri pulled back slightly, both of them breathing heavily.

"Living safely is just dying slowly," Yuri said, his voice trembling but sure.

"You are stealing my quotes now?" Mona whispered, a shaky smile breaking across her face.

"I am optimizing them," Yuri replied. He pushed his glasses back up his nose. "Montreal has Wi-Fi, right? We can optimize a long-distance relationship. We can figure it out."